Let’s face it, a calorie is not always a calorie. Sometimes they’re unicorns.
For the uninitiated, the term calorie is a metric for energy. The calorie conversation is a little complicated by what we read online.
There’s this pesky law of science, called the law of thermodynamics. There are actually three of them, but relevant to the human body they boil down to this basic concept: the relationship of calories you consume versus calories you burn will affect your mass.
Science laws are not theories. They are certainly disputable, but you’d better plan on being more famous than Einstein when you disprove this one.
The caloric bioavailabilities, or the number of calories that you body can absorb, of your macronutrients, are four per gram of protein or gram of carbohydrate and nine for fats. Alcohol comes in at seven.
Like it or not, the simple version goes like this: eat less than you burn, you will decrease in mass. Eat more than you burn, you will increase in mass. Think what you eat matters? It does, but not for affecting your mass.
Here are four people who changed their mass by eating foods you’ve been told will make you fat.
In 2010, Mark Haub, a professor of human nutrition at Kansas State University lived off cakey treats for ten weeks losing 27 pounds.
In fairness, he didn’t just eat twinkles. He also enjoyed other Hostess or Little Debbie snacks, mixing in Doritos, sugary cereals, Oreos.. oh, and daily protein shakes.
He made sure to get his vitamins in via a multi-vitamin and daily veggies, but the rest was all vending machine food.
Lest you get any bright ideas understand this man is a professor of nutrition, was carefully monitored by a physician, and counted his calories. You can’t just add veggies, protein and multi into your crappy diet to get the same results.
Anna Roufos, a contributor to fitnessmagazine.com, documented her seven-day fast food diet where she claims she dropped weight.
For her plan, she met with a dietician, who mapped out a series of fast food meals she would eat for the week. The scope included salads and burgers, accounting for a two-pound loss, but she lost one.
It’s a pretty thin test, but the point is she didn’t gain weight eating fast food. This goes against everything Morgan Spurlock’s documentary Super Size Me claimed. She did, however, complain of bloating.
A science teacher, limited his intake to 2000 calories of McDonald’s food every day for a documentary called, The Lunch Tray Reports. He also exercised for 45 minutes, five days a week.
John ate different items from the menu, but ordered fries every single day, totaling 540 straight meals at the golden arches. After the six months, John returned to a normal intake, eating food outside McDonald’s, but still eats what he wants.
Respectfully, I would assume he still stays within a calorie range if he’s trying to maintain the same mass.
New York City chef, Pasquale Cozzolino, originally from Naples, Italy, recently lost 94 pounds on The Pizza Diet.
At six-foot-six, Cozzolino weighed 254 pounds when he moved to New York, but ballooned to 370 eating Oreos, drinking soda and whatever he wanted.
When the doctor advised him he needed to lose weight, he spawned his evil plan: eat less than 2,700 calories every day. This included an entire margarita pizza every day.
He also took up kickboxing classes. He feels the pizza allowed him to stick to his plan. Sort sounds like this cheating diet I heard about somewhere.
Anecdotal evidence? Proof of unicorns? Maybe, but fun as heck to read about.
Unless you absolutely need to prove something to yourself, I don’t recommend trying one of these diets. Living off sugar for 30 days, then cutting off the stream could create some serious craving battles.
You’re better off managing your macros and calories.